September 26, 2019: The typically quiet library at Osgoode was disturbed when one of the hardworking librarians was heard crying to the sky in a fit of impotent rage. “Damn you, Wales and Sanger! How many generations must you corrupt before your evil hearts are sated?!” he exclaimed when he eyed a Wikipedia.org page for Carville v Carbolic Smoke Ball open on a 1Ls’ computer.
Another librarian expressed that they were disappointed but not surprised. “There is no hope; no student has been able to escape the grasping tendrils of casebrief.fandom.com for long. It has been my curse to bear witness. I would say it is up to the Lord to judge these poor souls, but there is no God here; only the spectre of indeterminate liability.”
“I mean, how are we supposed to compete with a case brief wiki? Sure, we have years of practical job experience, an extensive and intensive legal education as well as an emotional interest in making 1Ls succeed; but how can we compete with a website that can be edited by your grandma who thinks being up past 10pm is a crime? Who doesn’t love their Grandma? Not me!” said an anonymous source who asked that they be trusted as an authority on the matter.
Students, however, see the discovery of sources such as casebriefs.com as a major windfall: access to a website that can save their GPAs. As one student put it:
“I learned in business school that all the great business people- the Steve Jobs, Warren Buffetts and Shamwow Guys- of the world succeeded because they zigged when everyone else zagged. I’ve heard horror stories of other students staying up late to finish all their readings, listening intently to lectures and developing a strong rapport with their professors only to get a B. I mean, Bill Gates dropped out of Harvard. So by coasting through Crim, I’m really being a #entrepreneur. It’s not about working hard, but working smart.”
The anonymous source, who was wearing an Ivey sweater, went on to discuss how this worked for them throughout undergrad and how it will will definitely put them ahead of everyone else.
Another first year student told Obiter that they were going to use the abundance of sources available including casebriefsummary.com to maintain a positive work-life balance.
“I need to take care of myself; I’m not going to let law school ruin my physical and mental health. Look- I put in the work; but you need to make time to have some drinks with friends, have some drinks with the other with students in your section, have some drinks with your neighbors at Passy and have some fun at Pub Night. I’m actually really glad they started doing sangria at the JCR. Things like that make it feel like you can really take a break from the grind. My plan is not to work hard but to work smart.”
The anonymous source, who was wearing a McGill sweater, went on to discuss how this worked for them throughout undergrad and how it will definitely put them ahead of everyone else.
It truly is a new dawn for 1Ls everywhere. Please pour out a glass of your Pub Night beers in memory for our soon-to-be fallen librarians.