19 October 2021
In a strange and shocking turn of events, the Supreme Court of Canada has chosen to overturn the rule of precedent in the common law.
Sidney Scapegoat, recent member of Parliament for Dagozhingwaakaa, Ontario, had this to say.
“Precedent, for those not in the know, goes hand in hand with the concept of stare decisis—that when a court decision has been made in court, it is final. It is a fundamental tenet of common law. It is also, as I’m sure you agree, incredibly biased and racist. The system of precedent—and the further association with res judicata—suggests that the law is immutable. That there is no escape from the bounds set upon the country by old white men, over a hundred and fifty years ago. It’s a clean break from the colonialist traditions of Britain and America. Oh, there may be reinvention, but it refuses to reflect as fully as possible the intent and reality of a modern Canada.
“Doing away with precedent also means a greater sense of understanding for our civil-law counterparts in Québec. Did you know that if you make a botched decision as a judge under Québecois law, it can be fixed quite easily? No decision is considered true until it’s been submitted for review.”
What is to replace precedent in the modern system?
Scapegoat shrugs. “That’s not the issue right now. The important thing is that the Supreme Court of Canada has done the right thing for once. They’ve recognized their own fallibility and opened up the floor for proper critique. Oh, and incidentally made things a lot easier for every other judge in the country. Don’t like a decision? Well, that’s tough. No decision is bound on the other. We’ll keep appeal, of course, that’s a hallowed mark of the institution, and no upstart radicals should be able to take that away. But at least we’re done with stare decisis. I swear, the number of times I had to see those words in Ethics class at school…”
Further updates on the way about this monumental decision.
(Here’s hoping we survive to see it.)